Quotes

Although Battlegrounds is known most for being the ultimate gaming destination, it is also a great place to come to hear some of the most hilarious utterances to ever come out of human beings. This page serves as a record of these statements so that future generations can benefit from them.

First, we need to liquor up.  Then we need to fight mind flayers.
-Sarah V.

I get to pull first!  HUMPLING! HUMPLING! HUMPLING! HUMPLING!
(later)Oooh… “No humpling, no cry.”
-Chris Flanigan

How can Red Blok fighting monkeys be considered “historical”???
-Adam Hamilton

I hate Karmans.  They are the dumb.
-Nick Goodwin

Your soup cannot save you.
-Adam Hamilton

Aahh, Jordan… God’s failure.
-Killian Hobbs

YES!  I WILL [take advantage] of a six year old!
-Louie Delfin

Once I’ve filled up the crate with women-folk…
…you don’t say that too often in a game do you?

-Adam Hamilton

Jake:  Can I ask you a stupid question?  Are you my friend?
Keith:  I’ll kill you in your sleep.
Jake:  I told you it was a stupid question.

Roleplaying makes people stupid!
-Adam Hamilton

Seems like I’m rolling ones on a one-sided dice.
-Louie Delfin

Paul (to Jake):  You’re the H!
Jake:  With an “o” “o” “d”.

Flanigan:  I’ll spend a point to delay my action.
Nick:  I’ll punch you in the face!

Nick to Adam:  Shut up!  I’ll come back with my pregnant belly and kill you!

Now I’ll never get to say “I hit the monster in the face with my flaming balls.”
-Adam Hamilton

So basically we have unlimited money because Ben forgot to read something.
-Adam Hamilton

Adam Hamilton to Kevin Miller:  Shut up you albino bastard, men are talking!

I am Napoleon!  Napoleon was Russian…right?
-Nick Goodwin

Derek Mitchell: Arse Icon
(AKA Ice Archon)

Special thanks to Derek Stewart for this:

Then The Hood would shoot an anti-PLANET arrow!
-Jake Boychuk

Adam: I hate the air that gets caught in these card sleeves.
Louie: They should have sealed card sleeves.
Adam: But then you wouldn’t get the cards inside the sleeves.
Louie: They should have little zippers.

Paul: Holy… Nick is half humpback whale!
Nick: What? You’re really going to post that?

I’m just tired. I’m too tired to angry.
-Louie Delfin

It’s just a black dragon. How hard can it be?
-Russell Turnbull

Yeah, Battlegrounds is like a family. Paul, you’re like the father and Jordan is like the mother.
-Nick Goodwin

4-May-2008
Jake: The HOOD!
Adam: Everytime you say that it’s like you open a door to the elemental plane of stupidity.

24-Apr-2008
Keith (to Miller): Don’t sass me, you albino bastard. Get me a chair!

23-Apr-2008
Jake: Louie, are you generic?
Louie: Not really.

It smelled SO bad I’d have rather have taken some crap and snorted it like crack!
-Louie Delfin

I just want to go around and beat up generic dudes in the street until they puke.
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Anyone named Jerry in the end must get their a– kicked with a garbage can.
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Why? You don’t like the grammar I speak of?
-(All) Louie Delfin

Pinder, you’re a spiteface snakewease!
-Louie Delfin